Melissa A. Fabello, PhD is a sex and relationships educator who uses her backgrounds in educational development, holistic life coaching, and sexology to help you be in right relationship to yourself and others through clarifying your values, owning your truth, and building new relational skills.
Relationship coaching is a process through which you and I unpack your personal and relationship goals, strategize together for how to take steps toward meeting those goals, and create a comfortable container for emotional processing around the difficult blocks that come up. It’s work where you receive support for what’s hard – and movement toward new practices for more fulfillment.
Where “politicized” comes in is in the approach to this work. I believe that journeying toward being in right relationship to ourselves and to others – living our values – is deeply political work. It invites us to explore our social locations, our socialized thoughts and behaviors, and the long-lasting impacts of our trauma so that we can unlearn what isn’t serving us and replace it with values-aligned action.
I believe that collective liberation is an inside-out process – that the ripple effects of our self-development work and relational healing is community care and, ultimately, leads to the abolition of the very systems that take away the opportunity of authenticity from us in the first place.
Melissa offers regular educational and processing series for folks looking to better understand themselves and discover empowering new truths in a supportive community atmosphere. Currently, support groups are run for bisexual+ identity, avoidant attachment, and healing a broken heart.
Sort of, but not. It’s absolutely a modality for looking more deeply into the blocks that keep you engaged in unhelpful patterns and to help you discover your most authentic path forward. And hopefully it feels nourishing and generative. But in coaching, we focus on where you are now and where you’d like to go, rather than healing the trauma and pain of the past. Coaching is not therapeutic, and I am not a mental health professional. But coaching may be a better fit for your goals.
My base rate is $149 (USD) per session, which is on the high end of average for coaching services. Packages are also available at a discount.
I wish all of the help that we need could be covered by the government! But unfortunately, because this is not a health-based service, insurance can’t be applied to payments. That said, some workplaces are flexible with how they determine what counts as wellness – and if you have a wellness stipend through your employer, this could count!
Our goals are determined by you – because you are the expert of your own experience – and through an emergent process, where we work with what comes up. It isn’t a predetermined program, but rather, a collaborative effort toward aligning your life with your values. Do you want to start queer dating for the first time and need support? We’ll do that. Do you need help determining an appropriate relationship agreement in non-monogamy? Perfect. Let’s figure it out together.
Currently, I do not offer couples or group sessions. However, I’m open to seeing multiple people in a couple or polycule individually.
We will meet weekly or biweekly, at a regularly scheduled time, for 50 minutes. The length of time for meeting your goals will differ person to person. But I suggest setting aside at least three months to work together so that we have the space to really dig in, both practically and emotionally. I do not offer one-off or short-term appointments.
This monthly sex and relationships column is fueled by audience-submitted questions and delivered through snack-sized podcasts – with the ultimate goal of politicizing your relationships.
This monthly sex and relationships column is fueled by audience-submitted questions and delivered through snack-sized podcasts – with the ultimate goal of politicizing your relationships.
